Biggie vs. Tupac
Bad Boy vs. Death Row
Junior Mafia vs. West Side Connection

The 90’s were filled with musical rivalry from artists and labels from the East and West coast. As a hip hop head, I was deeply saddened by the death of the two best rappers alive (or dead), Biggie and Tupac. The “beef” between the East and the West, while has died with the two aforementioned rappers, has never been back to the place where the two sides would ever meet up again in musical harmony.

You’re probably wondering why I began this blog with a short synopsis of the “East Coast vs. West Coast” beef. Trust me, you’ll understand in just a few seconds…

Today I battled with some guilt. It wasn’t even something major, but it bothered me so bad that I’ve literally been “hiding” from God the last few days (as if that’s possible). I knew that all I needed to do was pray, ask for forgiveness, and hope that, while I had failed this test once again, that He’d show me some grace and mercy and pull me through this trial.

But I took on this guilt, afraid to ask Him for forgiveness and to help me because I knew that my troubles were all my fault and I didn’t feel like I should bother God with another trivial request to save me when I knew that it was I that created the problem.

No, no… I didn’t do anything crazy; I’ve just never been the best at managing money. I’ve gotten so much better, but I fall short every once in a while. God has delivered me out of some financial situations that I saw no way out of, and, if I can just be real with ya’ll, I should have never gotten out of.

But with experience comes growth and with growth comes higher levels of expectations from Him.

The last three days I’ve battled with the idea of simply getting on my knees and asking for forgiveness, asking Him to change my mindset regarding this area of my life, help me to prioritize what is important and what is not. Today was my day of reckoning.

Sometimes we lose ground because we feel we are unworthy to seek God for his grace, mercy, and forgiveness simply because we’ve made the same mistake over and over. We feel like I did the last few days; “I can’t ask Him to help me! I’ve made this mistake so many times. I’m sure He’s so fed up with me and my antics…”

But His word is true… (Here comes the East vs. West Coast connection)
As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us. Psalms 103:12 (Amplified Version)

Since the bible days, the East Coast ain’t never liked the West Coast. Ha!

No, seriously. Nothing that we can do can ever keep God from loving us. He’s anxiously waiting for us to come on back, set down our pride or pity and ask him for forgiveness. No matter how big or small the fault, His love for us never fails.

 The Lord is like a father to his children, tender and compassionate to those who fear him.
For he knows how weak we are; he remembers we are only dust.
Psalms 103:13-14

Now, does this mean that we do not have to sometimes suffer the consequences of our actions? Absolutely not. God is, while the most compassionate person I know, expects us to learn from mistakes, and like any good parent, will not always bail us out. But it is that tough love, you see, that makes Him the best “daddy” in the world. He’s consistent too. He didn’t let Jesus punk out on His great “lesson”, why should he let us?

On the Chase,

Alisha L.